Friday, August 29, 2014


I threw some little sausages on a hot skillet and they started popping and rolling around.

There is a small voice in the back of my head that occasionally starts shouting.

There is also a much louder, calmer, logical voice that tends to drown out the first one.

Thursday, August 21, 2014

Fat Dogs.

Fat dogs make me sad. Some people seem to love their dogs with food, ignoring the incredible amount of stress it puts on the poor animal's body. Others don't even understand what a healthy weight even looks like, because so many dogs are so fat. A lot of people actually think body condition is subjective, despite the existance of objective veterinary body condition scoring charts. "I don't think he's fat." Would they be willing to take a healthy dog and strap a few extra pounds on them?

Imagine forcing a dog to wear a heavy backpack all the time...

Instead of loving our dogs with treats, we could be loving them by taking off those extra pounds they've been carrying around. Isn't mobility and reduced pain worth more than an extra cookie, or a full dinner bowl?

Thursday, August 14, 2014


Over the winter we had one really good hard freeze, and it happened to be on a morning when I needed to leave the house right at dawn. I came outside and found the windshield of my car completely iced over, something that had not happened to me in over a decade.

Back when I was in high school and encountered a frosty windshield a handful of times, I always solved the problem by pouring a little cold water over the ice and then clearing it with the wipers. This time it just made more ice.

Certainly this was something I was aware could happen, but it was not something I had ever personally experienced. People who have lived in places with actual winter ;earn all sorts of handy tricks for solving this type of problem. They know they can scrape the ice off with a credit card. They own ice scrapers. I have never seen an ice scraper in person. I don't even know where I would buy one. Stores here literally don't carry them.

Eventually my car thawed out enough to be driveable and I made it to work a bit late and recounted my harrowing tale to my coworkers, who were shivering in their jeans and sweatshirts because I'm apparently the only one who owns a winter coat and mittens.

Thursday, August 7, 2014


I don't watch television, but I'm not missing much. Something that I do enjoy is YouTube clips of Jimmy Kimmel challenging parents to prank their children. My favorite is the annual compilation of kids crying because their parents claimed to have eaten all of their Halloween candy.

I sweat to god these videos are better than candy. I love them. This makes me a terrible person.