Suspense is like Anaphylaxis

I've been helping a friend edit her novel, every few weeks she gives me a new chapter. I read it and then return it covered in scribbles about grammar, possible continuity errors, awkward phrasing, word choice, phrasing I love, questions, and predictions. It's a great story, and getting the chapters so far apart means I'm pretty much perpetally dying to find out what happens next.

Early in the story, one character tells the protagonist that she definitely cannot ever be seen by another character. Halfway through the book, the protagonist arranges for the two to meet. I read this chapter right after getting my allergy shots. An important thing to know about allergy shots is that they have a slight possibility of causing a systemic reaction that makes you puff up and die. Allergists make you wait for 30 minutes after your shots because if you are going to puff up and die, it's probably going to be in that period. This systemic reaction is called anaphylaxis, and can progress to anaphylactic shock, where your airway swells up until you can't breathe. The cure for this is a shot of epinephrine and cup of weapons-grade Benadryl.

I read feverishly through confrontation scene, barely breathing through the suspense. I finished the chapter, and somehow still felt...suspenseful.

Apparently anaphylaxis feels a lot like suspense.

Convergence Insufficiency.

I had an educational eye exam last year, and discovered that I have managed to make it to the age of 29 with an undiagnosed eye problem. This all started when my niece's developmental therapist wanted to test the entire extended family for learning disabilities. Among other things, she showed me a picture of a cube like this:

You and I both know that this is a static picture. It's not moving. My brain knows it's not moving. Obviously it's not moving. However, the therapist asked me to count the number of cubes in the third row and then asked if the squares were moving. You know, when I really look at it, the cube moves a bit like this:

The therapist also showed me a blank musical staff and asked if the lines were moving. Intellectually I know they aren't moving, but if I really look they do this:

The eye problem is called a convergence insufficiency. It means one of my eyes points out and up, instead of in perfect alignment with the other eye. Something like 15% of kids have this issue, but it is usually caught and corrected with eye exercises. Convergence insufficiency can make everything look blurry, especially sharply-contrasted things like words on a page, or black and white patterns. It can make it difficult for kids to concentrate, and make reading difficult. I've always been a fast and avid reader, apparently my eyes are really good at compensating. The illusion of everything moving is caused by my wonky eye perpetually trying to align itself to focus and then rapidly flicking back to its natural placement. To correct this I now have prisms in my glasses. My glasses are tinted blue-gray to stop solid colors from looking like magic eye puzzles.

The eye doctor also determined that it takes a full three seconds for me to switch focus between tiny fine print up close and the eye chart on the wall. Now I have blue-tinted prism bifocals and I can see everything far more clearly than I ever have before. It's like the difference between regular and high-definition television.

Sharing these revelations with Z was fun.

Guess who else has prisms now?

Permanent pink hair dye.

I have pink hair. I only dye it about once a month, and the color lasts pretty darned good in between dyings. When I first determined that I wanted pink hair, I set out on a quest to find some permanent pink hair dye. While such a product does not truly exist, there are definitely ways to get the effect of permanent pink hair dye for permanently pink hair. Done properly, the whole process is a lot kinder to your hair than actual permanent hair dye.

1. "Permanent" is relative.

If you've ever tried to maintain a different hair color before, you know you have to keep dying your hair regularly. Hair grows, colors fade, and even permanent dyes need to be redone every month or so. There is no way to change your hair color without maintaining it regularly.

2. All dyes are not equal.

All dyes are not created equal, and not all colors of a certain brand are equally effective. Pirate? uses violet Pravana dye and it lasts months and months in her hair. I tried their "wild orchid" color and it washed out in a week. I use "fuschia shock" by Manic Panic and it lasts for weeks, but their "cotton candy pink" shade washes out much faster. I have found that the Manic Panic colors that look black or nearly black in their jars (in real life, not on the website) are the ones that have the most pigment and last the longest. It helps to try several different products to see what works best on your hair.

3. Say no to burny chemicals.

Permanent hair dye has a dark side, it's full of chemicals that burn your scalp. Leaving this type of dye on for too long can totally destroy your hair. Likewise, bleach or lightening agents can also dry out your hair and leave it horribly frizzy and gross. Unless your hair is really dark, you can completely forgo "lightening" it and just put your colors on over it. Pick a nice dark shade of your favorite color, you'll most likely end up with a nice vibrant tint over your natural hair color. Semi-permanent dyes like Manic Panic and Pravana's Vivids are non-toxic vegetable dyes that won't fry your hair and can be left on long enough to color almost any hair (or pet).

4. Longer is better.

The cool thing about using vegetable dyes is that they don't fry your hair, so you can just go ahead and leave them on indefinitely. I leave mine on for at least four hours, and often more than eight hours. The dye has to stay wet in order to keep working, so it helps to wrap your head in plastic wrap. Beauty supply shops also sell some nifty cotton ropes that you can stick around your hairline to help keep the dye off your skin.

5. Heat helps.

Heat is recommended by a lot of dye manufacturers to help set the color in your hair or make it brighter. I usually blow dry my hair for 10-15 minutes or until I get bored. Rinse well in cool water, and your color should last for several weeks.

Freckles.

This is how I normally draw myself.

Note the total absence of freckles. In reality I am absolutely covered in freckles. Like, every molecule of my skin that has ever seen a suggestion of natural light is covered in freckles. I am so freckly that people assume my hair is red underneath the pink. The fact that I leave the freckles out when drawing myself is not actually because I am ashamed of my freckles, or even that I'm too lazy to bothering adding them. I just kind of...forget. Not just when I'm drawing, either. Pretty much anytime I look at myself closely in a mirror I am startled.

Gonna try to blame this one on the ADD...